More musings from the land of the unemployed

Hello again!

Interesting day in the brain.  I'll see if I can get the thought progression down here on paper (umm, so to speak).

I've been pretty bummed recently that I've been unable to find a job.  Now, admittedly, I've been very picky about which jobs I've even been willing to apply for, the theory being, we can afford for me to go without a job for a while, so I'll take my time, and make sure I get one that I'm happy with.  Unfortunately, this has not been panning out, and it's been ticking me off.  There was ONE day so far that I was actually pretty content to be job free (I remember getting a lot of chores done, showing the house to some people, and then exercising and thinking to myself "Hmm, this would have been difficult if I had a job").

So, today I take the car in for a service I planned would take 30-60 minutes.  I use the time to walk down to the park, and back again.  While I'm there, I decide to see if I can volunteer with the parks and rec department as a volleyball/track/football coach or something. ..  . . . . but I'm TURNED DOWN!  Apparently, they've had a lot of volunteers recently, and don't need me.

So now, not only can I not get paid for my services, I CAN'T EVEN GIVE THEM AWAY FOR FREE!!!!!   GRRRRRRR!!!!  On top of that, I'm told at the car place that the job will be taking 3-4 additional hours, and will cost a whole lot more.  So . . . . ..  I'm not in a good mood.

I decide to walk home.  I live 7 miles away, and have already walked 3 miles, so this is going to be quite the workout.  But it gives me time to think.

I think about my grandfather.  He has not been feeling well lately, and someday (hopefully a day looooooooong from now), I may be asked to stand up and say a few words at his memorial.  So,  although I'll miss him terribly, I wonder what I would say?  Most people eulogize that they wish they had spent more time with their families. . . . . . .  but I don't see my grandfather actually saying that.  He's a child of the depression that just absolutely MUST work, everyday, without fail. . . . and has never taken anytime off to kick back and enjoy life (he's actually worked more years at his current company AFTER he retired than he did before retirement).

Now, I haven't had a lot of male role-models in my life . . .. . but I wondered if this might be one area I might not want to model after him?  Now that I have an opportunity to spend more time with my family, am I not maximizing it by enjoying it fully while it lasts?  Am I incapable of that like my Grandfather?

Well, not for the rest of today I wasn't!  I finished the walk home, took a good shower, did a bunch of chores, played some games, picked up the kiddos, goofed off with them, went to my sister's self-thrown birthday party to wish her well, and had probably the best day I've had since I've been unemployed.   HA!  That'll show .. . .me?  Yep.  I think I just showed myself how it's done. :)